The Green Beret
Many years ago, there was a police officer in my class who literally had no fears. Officer ‘Smith’, a former Green Beret, was a member of his department’s S.W.A.T. team. He could not relate to any Fear-Based discussions, except from the position of being able to see how other people reacted to him because of their fears.
Officer Smith told us of his dream to become a Secret Service Agent. In fact, everything in his life had been geared to that one goal for as long as he could remember.
Unfortunately, his dream was destroyed by a single event. One night, while still in the army, he got in a bar fight because someone whistled at his date. It turned into a ‘Rambo’ situation, with him ending up fighting the whole bar, and beating up several men. After his arrest he found out that he had lost his security clearance, and his dream was now gone. There was no chance he could ever become a Secret Service Agent.
When he finished telling this story, I took a breath and said, “So basically, what you are telling me is that you are a weakling. You have no power, and it’s probably a good thing that you didn’t become a Secret Service Agent.”
I could see his rage building as I continued, “Let me get this straight. A guy did something you didn’t like, so you had to make him pay for it. Let’s see now, he spent an evening at the hospital, and you lost your dream. Who do you think paid the higher price? Who really lost?”
“They hurt your feelings, your pride, and your ego
for a minute. By reacting with rage,
you hurt yourself for a lifetime.”
His jaw slackened and he just looked at me. I continued, “You lost. You were beaten by sound waves. What a wimp.” I have never been the type of person to quit when I was ahead.
I was slowly backing up at that point because I was pretty sure I would get a reaction. But he just smiled and said, “I understand. I think I’m getting it now. I’ve arrested people who’ve thrown their lives away because someone else made them mad. I always wondered how they could be so blind. Yet, I did exactly the same thing.”
I smiled and breathed a sigh of relief. He smiled again and said, “You are the first person who has ever called me a name like that and walked away.” I was truly grateful he understood what I was talking about. Had he attacked me, our fight would have been a joke. While he probably knew dozens of ways of killing someone, I have never even been in a fistfight … not even once.
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